


The Choices We Make

by Maknatuna



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-29
Updated: 2012-11-29
Packaged: 2017-11-19 20:28:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 560
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/577330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maknatuna/pseuds/Maknatuna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Inspired by 8X08 and Castiel's line "I might kill myself"</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Choices We Make

**Author's Note:**

> English is my third language, so if you spot any mistakes please tell me so I could correct them. 
> 
> Thank you :)

As soon as Castiel gets rejected by heaven he chooses to go on his own, away from the brothers. For a short while. At least this is what he thinks. He needs to clear his head and some time alone. 

Days are replaced by weeks but his depression only gets worse. He has made terrible mistakes, heaven does not want him back, he thinks he has become a burden for the brothers. And guilt eats him from the inside. 

It’s a cold, rainy day and the angel stands at a river bank. He is alone. All normal people are locked up inside their houses in the warmth in front of TV. Small, white air puffs come out of his slightly parted lips as he looks down at the water surface. Rain drops dance and form circles on it.

Castiel’s trench coat is wet and dark from the rain but the angel does not pay attention. He slightly moves his hand alongside his body and something slips out of the sleeve. An angel blade.

“Forgive me father, for I am about to sin. This is the only way,” he croaks as he holds the blade with numb fingers.

He raises the blade to stab himself in the heart but someone’s strong hand grabs his wrist and the angel startles. He loses control only for a few seconds but it is enough for an attacker to snatch the blade from him and throw it away. 

“You, stupid son of a bitch!” painfully familiar voice yells at him and someone turns the angel around. 

“What the hell do you think you are doing?” Dean grabs Castiel’s shoulders and shakes him hard. 

“Dean…I…” Castiel does not know how the older Winchester found him and he does not how to answer that question either. He just opens and closes his mouth. He licks his dry lips and tries to swallow.

“I..I am not needed. I do not know what to do.” The last words are barely above a whisper.

Green eyes burn with anger and stare at him so intently that the angel feels uncomfortable and averts his gaze.

Look at me, Cas….”

Castiel lifts his gaze and looks at the hunter. 

“I will tell you what to do.”

The angel slightly frowns. How does Dean know and he does not.

“And what would tha….”

His question gets cut off by the press of the hunter’s lips against his mouth. Castiel gasps and tenses from unexpectedness but when the kiss gets more demanding, insistent and passionate, the angel finds himself responding enthusiastically.

“Good beginning,” Dean murmurs against his lips and wraps a hand around Castiel’s waist tugging him closer.

“You are not going anywhere,” he adds after breaking a kiss.

“Dean…”

“Shut up, Cas.” The hunter slides his hand through Castiel’s hair and presses their foreheads together.

“And if you try to run away once again…Then…” Dean grins wolfishly.

“Then what?” Castiel arches his eyebrow.

“I still have the holy oil left. I know how you love this stuff.” The hunter laughs when the angel gives him a bitchface. 

“Let’s go,” Dean gives the angel a fond smile.

Castiel nods and picks up his blade. 

As they walk towards the Impala Castiel feels that a mountain has fallen off his chest. Maybe this is what he needed all this time. 

 

The End


End file.
